Resolutely Apathetic

Here are my non-resolutions for 2009...
1. I'm not going to lose any weight despite going to the gym 3-4 times/week.
2. I'm not going to become more enlightened by spending more time reading and less time watching TV even though I can't find anything on TV worth watching.
3. I'm not going to become more passionate through music and art despite spending more time practicing guitar.
4. I'm not going to be more productive at work despite spending less time surfing the web.