Be Aware of ShamWow Imitators

some random thoughts about OJ

"heh listen to me make farting noises with my hands..."


9 years is probably a lot for this particular "armed robbery". If the sentence reflects his acquital from the nicole brown simpson murder, is that really justice?
Is there any consistency left in the justice system?

Story Virus

(...continued from Splotchy)
...and that was pretty much the last we heard from Splotchy.

1...2...3...holy crap

this is why this sign

was created.

Woman Wearing Cow Suit Arrested

I often have the intention of just letting my blog fade away into oblivion, but this story absolutely must be posted.

A Middletown woman is arrested, after chasing children, peeing on a porch, and blocking traffic... all while wearing a cow suit.

Original story here

Photoshop of the Day

Weekend Warriors

Softball season is finally over. Not a particularly good season and only made worse because i played with this pulled hamstring for the last 3 weeks.

I need one of these!

Pam Anderson IS PETA (or is that PITA?)

This is just too outrageous to pass up...

Pammy Sue hand delivered a letter to the manager of a KFC while in Australia which states in part...

Dear Mr Baladi,
I’ve been in Australia filming Big Brother, in which my housemates and I are confined and sealed off from the outside world, much like the chickens who are crammed inside barns for KFC. Fortunately, I won’t be stomped to death, have my legs broken or be scalded to death in a tank of hot water – yet, as PETA’s undercover videos have revealed, the chickens raised for KFC’s restaurants in Australia often suffer these abuses.

1) Typical of 'reality' shows, sealed off from the outside world somehow still leaves room for her to make public appearances at KFC.

2) Untypical of reality shows, "like chickens who are crammed inside barns for KFC". In fact I don't think i've ever seen any show that made me think, "damn, that's just like those chickens crammed inside of barns for KFC".

3) Unlike those chickens, in this reality show, Pammy won't "be stomped to death, have [her] legs broken or be scalded to death in a tank of hot water..."
No Pammy, but if you were, it might raise the ratings. Something to consider.
and yes, except for that difference, you're quite similar to a chicken, all breast and no brain... but i digress.

story on PETA's blog site here
Pam's complete letter here

New CA cell phn lw ds nt prohibit txt msging. Ur bff Jill apprvs.

I'm a bit of a libertarian at heart. I think the seatbelt laws are unconstitutional. But even I was glad to see an attempt made at curbing cell phone use while driving. It is estimated that between 300-600 lives will be saved each year from this law - I assume they base this estimate on traffic related deaths involving cell phones and that it's not just some number pulled out of their collective asses.

I really want to believe that rational thought went into the making of this law. And yet when I find out that with all the big show about the big crackdown and 'no grace period' for people caught talking on their cell phones while driving, it turns out there is a glaring hole in the law. It doesn't prohibit text messaging.

How in the hell can text messaging not be considered infinitely more distracting?!

From the official California DMV web page.

Q: Does the new “hands-free” law allow drivers 18 and over to text message while driving?
A: The law does not specifically prohibit that, but an officer can pull over and issue a citation to a driver of any age if, in the officer’s opinion, the driver was distracted and not operating the vehicle safely. Sending text messages while driving is unsafe at any speed and is strongly discouraged.

the burn

First softball game of the season last night. I tagged up from 2nd base on a deep sacrifice fly and coming into home plate the catcher fakes like he's taking a throw.
I do a quick drop to slide in. Focker!
i play as hard as the next guy, but there is absolutely no reason to fake a play at the plate other than to get somebody hurt.

picture update

Little League season is over for all the p0nklets. It was a very rough year for dad and youngest p0nklet here as we had the difficult task of starting an expansion team of rookies into the league.

What's In A Name?

I stumbled across this yellow pages ad in our local phone book over the weekend. I am not letting anyone with this name near my mouth.

video of the week

System Administrator: Undeliverable...

Backscatter (also known as outscatter, misdirected bounces, blowback or collateral spam) is a side-effect of e-mail spam, viruses and worms, where email servers receiving spam and other mail send bounce messages to an innocent party. This occurs because the original message's envelope sender is forged to contain the e-mail address of the victim. A very large proportion of such e-mail is sent with a forged From: header, matching the envelope sender.

When a spammer uses your email address to spam, all of the undeliverable mail gets returned to YOU. So instead of getting the odd spam msg once in a while addressed to you, you will get hundreds of spam email 'returned' to you because the other system thinks you are the sender. Spam filters don't usually stop these because they are coming from a valid sender, the mail system administrator to wherever it was originally sent. In other words, this particular kind of spam is a major pain in the arse. I've heard of this phenomenon but had not experienced it until today. The first couple started trickling in this morning at 9:28am. By 9:58 (30 minutes later) I had received 513 such messages.
Spending my Friday (the 13th) deleting spam from my inbox, NICE!

Criminal(s) of the Week

Police nab three for copper thefts
story here

highlights

Jon Krisner Manson, 32, and Christopher Lee Jackson, 39, who both live in room 255 of America's Best Value Lodge, and Patryce Eboni Ryland, 27, who lives in room 257,

Jackson told the officer that he lived in room 257 with his girlfriend and her two children, Pickles and Toy Toy, according to the report. Jackson couldn't give the woman's last name, telling the officer that he had not known her for long,

Tornado vs First State Bank of Iowa

Vid of the Week

one of the p0nklets showed me this one last night.

Story Virus

I was tagged to continue a story virus started by Splotchy. This is my first attempt at one of these things, so here goes.

-------------------------------
"Interesting", I thought to myself, "I don't know anybody named Ted Kaczynski."
Unless it's going to clear this damn sinus infection in my head, I'll have to open it later.
I set it on the kitchen table, and prepared my tincture of herbal tea remedies.

***

Please continue this story virus.

I tag:

heals at the ultra-mundane
lonie polony
and the Imaginary Reviewer

Have a little free time on your hands?

You probably won't see this in the 2008 Beijing Olympics...

¡ʇuǝɹǝɟɟıp sı sıɥʇ ʍou

˙spɹɐʍʞɔɐq puɐ uʍop ǝpısdn ʇxǝʇ ɹnoʎ ƃuıuɹnʇ ɹoɟ ǝʇısqǝʍ ǝlʇʇıl looɔ ɐ s,ǝɹǝɥ

/ʇǝu˙ʇxǝʇdılɟ˙uǝ˙ʍʍʍ//:dʇʇɥ

Sportsmanship is still alive (somewhere).

If you can watch this without shedding an emotional tear, you need a checkup.

American Idle

So you still don't think American Idol is scripted? Watch Paula Abdul critique one singer's second round performance before it happens. Watch the other hosts frantically try to cover.

Darwin Awards 2008: We Have A Winner

Brazil gives up on priest carried off by balloons
(story here)

The Rev. Adelir Antonio de Carli has been missing since Sunday, when he lifted off from the port city of Paranagua strapped to 1,000 balloons and wearing a helmet, an aluminum thermal flight suit, waterproof coveralls and a parachute.

...and nobody got a picture of this?!

UPDATE: This is an alleged photo.

Only 246 shopping days left until xmas...

i saw a commercial on TV last night advertising the 2009 Dodge Journey. This practice of releasing next year's models has been around for decades (eg. the '65 Mustang is often called 64½). But this is April! I bought a brand new 2008 Nissan in February and now in April of '08 it's technically a year old already. This cheesy marketing gimmick is really getting out of hand - most of the major auto manufacturers have now released their 2009 models (see article at Car and Driver)
My question now is, how far will they take this? Will we see the 2010 models by January '09? sooner? at what point does it become ridiculous?

My baby I purchased in February, are you now old news?

My Favorite Guitarist: Greg Howe

WTF?! There are some stupid people out there...

How Obsolete Are You

from the website www.obsoleteskills.com

When was the last time you had to...
Change the ribbon on a typewriter
Rewind audio or video cassettes
Adjust the rabbit ears on your TV set
Check your beeper
Format a floppy disk
Have to put www in front of every URL
Load film into a camera
Use a darkroom
Lick stamps
Pay with a check
Use a pay phone
Look up a business in the Yellow Pages
Switch from TV to Game Mode on the box behind the TV
Blow into a dusty Nintendo cartridge to make it work
Use the Dewey Decimal System to find a book
Wind your watch
do Long division (other than for school)
Call the radio station to find out what song that was
Rip the trim with the holes off the sides of computer paper
Call someone collect
Replace the tape in your answering machine
Thread a filmstrip
Pop popcorn with hot oil
Heat a ``TV Dinner'' in the oven
Get up to manually change the channel
Repair a television set
Sharpen a razor blade
Add water to your car battery
Ride a single-speed bike
Set the time on a VCR
Download music from the original Napster
Put tape over the punched-out holes on a VCR tape so you can use it again
Use correction fluid
Put a nickel on the tone arm of a record player to keep it from skipping
Pop in a flash cube
Use a choke
Clean a vinyl record
Defrost the refrigerator
Refill a fountain pen
Use carbon paper to make copies
Change tracks on an 8-track tape
Tape songs off the radio onto a cassette tape
Sniff freshly mimeographed tests
Send a handwritten letter
Write in cursive
Mow the yard with a non-powered push mower (May be coming back, though ...)
Manually enter prices into an old-fashioned cash register
Clean the head of your VCR
Crawl under the door of a pay toilet

Priceless

Britney Spears in minor car accident

I realize this is old news by now (story here) but it was too amusing to pass up, and a couple of comments are in order here...

Spears was in stop-and-go traffic when her car struck a 2006 Nissan in front of her that had stopped. The Nissan then pushed forward into another vehicle. No damage was noted to any of the vehicles.

I don't know how many of these kind of accidents you've been in. I rear-ended somebody in "stop-and-go traffic" in my lifted Suburban last summer and ended up with $4000 in damage. I can't conceive how you can hit a car hard enough to push him into the next car and still not have any damage. My guess is that people were paid to not notice any damage.

Finally... WTF is this woman doing driving a car?! How many examples of her poor driving judgment do we need before her license is revoked? Obviously somebody is using an entirely different numbering system when adding up her driving record points.

Mascots Gone Wild

Crayola Continues Its Progressive Bent

There are certain American icons that we rely on for stability in this topsy-turvy world. For many decades, Crayola had the honor and responsibility of setting the standard for color names. Burnt Umber was simply brown until Crayola called it Burnt Umber. Whether it was 8, 16, or 64 colors, Crayola defined color.
This isn't the first time that Crayola has caved in and renamed some of it's colors, we've begrudgingly accepted that a little change is occasionally necessary. We gradually accepted the trendy shift that introduced colors associated with well-known objects, eg. 'Macaroni & Cheese'.

But this time they've gone too far. It would have been barely tolerable to give the colors names of emotions (eg. 'Envy Green'). These latest changes, however, have to be a discouraging forecast of impending mamby-pambyism.
Without cheating, see if you can tell me what color is:
1) super happy
2) fun in the sun
3) giving tree
4) bear hug
5) happy ever after
6) famous
7) best friends
8) awesome

(OK, if you insist on cheating, here is the story that prompted this post.)

People, this has to be stopped or the next step will be:

Created by OnePlusYou

i don't know how this could have happened.

Rare skiing accident in the Keweenaw

I don't have much pity for snowboarders.
Anyway, here is the story.

Public Restroom Question #38:

I'm generally in favor of dental hygiene, but when I stumble across things like this, it actually makes me a little queasy. I'm not microphobic, but let's face some facts - there is some nasty nasty business that takes place in public restrooms, by some nasty nasty people, that have no qualms about leaving their nastiness behind for others. So much nastiness that it can easily permeate the entire restroom even after the more scrupulous visitors. I, therefore, keep my visits seldom, short, and with minimal contact. I would not walk barefoot or take food into a public restroom. Brushing your teeth in there just seems counter-productive if you ask me.

ps. i thought it would be interesting to use only pre-existing tags for this post.

DB Cooper Where Are You

Expert: Parachute not D.B. Cooper's
AMBOY, Wash., April 1 (UPI) -- An old parachute found in rural Washington last week wasn't used by skyjacker D.B. Cooper back in 1971, an expert said Monday night.

Earl Cossey told The (Portland) Oregonian Monday night an FBI agent took the parachute to his home last Friday and asked him if he believed it could be the one Cooper used when he leaped from a Northwest Airlines flight the night of Nov. 24, 1971, with $200,000 in ransom money.

"Not even close, not even close," said Cossey, who packed the four parachutes given to Cooper.

An agent in the FBI's Seattle office told The Oregonian the law enforcement agency wanted to take one more step Tuesday before commenting.

The mystery of what happened to Cooper after he leaped from the jetliner that night remains unsolved.

/look for it to appear on EBay shortly

Update: Heals may be on to something here. Could this be DB Cooper?

Happy Easter

Independent Missionary succumbs to auto asphyxiation by goat sects

Local pastor killed by goat

this story is just loaded with comedic gold.

The wife of a prominent Montgomery County pastor told deputies that her husband was apparently killed by a goat he was trying to return to a fenced-in area near their state Highway 13 home, according to Montgomery County Sheriff's Office spokesman Chaplain Ted Denny.

The Rev. Liston Richardson, 76, pastor of Sunnyview Independent Missionary Baptist Church, was found dead by his wife, Lucille, after he didn’t return for some time, according to an incident report.

Mrs. Richardson told Deputy David Johnson she found her husband laying on the ground — the rope used to tie the goat wrapped around Mr. Richardson's neck and feet. She said she noticed he wasn't breathing, but when she tried to get near her husband, the goat tried to attack her.

"It was a tragic accident," said Denny, who knew Mr. Richardson. "He was a wonderful man of God."

The goat was later shot, Denny said.

Today's Inspiring Easter Photo

3 years later, this one is still my favorite.

Somebody Has Connections

"Jessie Vigil's vehicle is seen at his home in Las Vegas, N.M. in March 2007. Vigil's black-and-white car sports a red-and-blue emergency bar across the top and the word 'police' painted on the doors. Law enforcement agencies say what he's done with his car isn't illegal as long as he doesn't act like a police officer." story here
(AP photo/Las Vegas Optic, David Giuliani)

I would argue that a lack of common sense is indeed acting like a police officer, or at least certain law enforcement officials.

America's Pastime

It's baseball season!

Because nothing spells unbearable condemnation like a UN resolution.

"The leniency shown to celebrity drug-users in Britain came under severe criticism from the United Nations yesterday.

The UN's drug control agency said the easy ride given to stars by police, prosecutors and the courts sent out the wrong message to young people and generated cynicism over drug laws."

I'm pretty sure I speak for most everybody in saying ... "duh".
oh wait, sorry, that was the court-generated cynicism speaking. So what is the "wrong" message that is being sent? Newsflash: Celebrities get special treatment!
No doubt this 'severe criticism' handed down by the UN is going to whip Britain's legal system into shape and in so doing wipe out celebrity drug abuse.
...and then the UN can get back to straightening out that little misunderstanding in Darfur.

Read the story: Tame the cocaine stars: Drug-taking celebrities blasted by UN

Classy

Olsens wanted for Playboy
Apparently Mr. Heffner is getting bored/senile and is now entertaining thoughts of 12yo boys. The twins apparently aren't falling for it however, and are holding out for something more "classy". I've got news for them.

Homeless Soccer Team

Nominated for 2008 Darwinian

I wish i could embed this video. You'll just have to trust me that it's worth seeing.
video here

Vigilante Justice

This is just all kinds of political incorrectness, but Rufus Terrill's 'BumBot' is the kind of crime deterrent that would make Mack Machowicz (FutureWeapons) green with envy.

Read the story about this Atlanta bar owner and his RoboCop here

Star Trek meets Jefferson Airplane

"Luke, I'm your father"

Pentagon Says It Blasted Falling Satellite

Could you possibly ask for a better excuse to test our 'Star Wars' technology?
My favorite quotes:

"...the military is tracking the debris as it falls over the Atlantic and Pacific oceans."

The Atlantic and Pacific Oceans? in other words, they have no idea where all of the crap is going to fall, so in order to avoid panic they're saying it will land in the oceans.

"...so far officials have tracked 'nothing larger than a football.'"

That's almost reassuring, unfortunately, even a football traveling at 2 brazillion miles/hour could take out a building.

So in short, what we've just done is created the first world wide cluster bomb.

What You Talkin' 'bout Willis?

Sorry ladies, but he's taken!
Say it ain't so. Alas, one of the world's great secrets, Coleman (40) and his beaming bride, 22yo Shannon Price, were married last August but nobody went public with it.
The story is here

classic quotes:

"I just want my own identity as well because I don't want to be known as Gary Coleman's wife," she said.

i can definitely understand that. I wouldn't want to be known as Gary Coleman's wife either.

Coleman played down their age differences, saying "I don't have issues with age, I have issues with intelligence ... She's more intelligent than I am and that's what matters to me."

While it wouldn't take a rocket scientist to be more intelligent than Gary Coleman, you still have to wonder about the intelligence of somebody marrying him.

Price, who is 5-foot-7, and Coleman, who is 4-foot-8, also played down their height gap.
"That doesn't really matter to me," she said. "He was 10 feet tall to me because he was sweet and I really liked his personality."

10 feet tall if you sliced him down the middle and glued him back end-to-end...almost.
As to the "sweet" personality... well there's this disorderly conduct citation shortly before he was married (the woman in the story was indeed Shannon), as well as the 1999 incident where he punched an autograph seeker.

According to other interviews, things are not going so well. Color me shocked.

From the Bowels of our WTF video clips...

"Quit" is not in his vocabulary

101 Arrests puts Alger Scott slightly ahead of Cedric McCants
story here

be sure to check out the slideshow for more mugshot goodness.

Ash Wednesday

How To Fix A Toilet That Doesn't Stop Running.

(Chapter 3 in 'home repair for the cheap and clueless')

Ok, so the garage makeover to the kid's rec room didn't turn out so bad. i can haz sk1llz. So how hard can it be to fix a toilet that doesn't stop running?
Answer: It can be cheap and easy...but don't count on it.

Often times you simply need to replace the flapper. These do wear out from time to time to the point that they don't seal adequately, eventually leaking out the contents of the tank until the water drops low enough to force a refill.
Flappers are relatively cheap and relatively easy to replace. Downside: There aren't many variations to these simple contraptions, but invariable you will almost always buy the wrong one on your first attempt. Allow yourself enough time to make this discovery and return it for the right one before the store closes. Also, some of these things leave a really nasty film on everything they touch. Plan on lots of soap and water for cleanup.


The next most common thing to go wrong is the handle lever that lifts the flapper. When this little two dollar item goes awry, it will likely cost you $200 by the time you have the problem fixed.
Step 1: the metal parts are always corroded (always buy plastic). spray some WD-40 on the threads so that you can build up the false hope that you will actually be able to disassemble the lever for replacement.
Step 2: with a wrench, attempt to loosen lever assembly until you hear a crack in the porcelain tank and the sound of 3 gallons of water rushing onto the bathroom floor.
Step 3: Quickly locate water supply valve to the toilet and turn it off. Some of the new valves are plastic and will likely strip before you can shut the water off tightly (always buy metal).
Step 4: Quickly go outside the house, locate the water supply line to the house and shut off the water to the entire house. Award yourself 20 pts for each running appliance that uses water - dishwasher, clothes washing machine, etc. Award yourself an extra 50pts if somebody is in the middle of a shower.
Step 5: See instructions on changing flapper for changing out water supply valve to toilet. Upside: Not as messy. Downside: you won't be able to find a wrench that will fit.
Step 6: Do not attempt to repair a porcelain tank, it simply will not be waterproof. Save yourself the time and frustration, bite the bullet and purchase a new tank.
Step 7: If you're a resident of California, you can take this opportunity to learn a little known fact: You can no longer purchase 3 gallon toilet tanks. Congratulations, you get to buy a completely new toilet.
Step 8: Call a plumber. If you have completed steps 1 through 7 on your own, this step is really essential. You've already spent $200 on a new toilet in order to fix a $5 part. It's time to spend $100 on a plumber to minimize the number of $200 toilets you'll need to purchase to complete this repair.

Way Too Cool To Pass Up

More Astounding Criminals

Jury Finds Man Guilty Of Shooting Two Orange County Deputies

...prosecutors said Ernest Simmons made a choice to shoot two deputies even though he said he accidentally shot at them 11 times with 2 different guns.

damn thing keeps going off, both of them!

Snow Day?

That kid in Virginia last week that got reemed by the school administrator's wife for asking for a snow day needs to move out here to the 'Left Coast'. A whopping .8" (yes, that's point 8 inches - as in less than one inch) caused some of our local schools to cancel school today. Nevermind that it wasn't enough snow to stick to the rain-soaked roads. Nevermind that it quit snowing by 5pm Sunday night and for the most part, the remaining vestiges were washed from our lawns by the hail and rain overnight. I accept that it was the most snow we've seen here in 15 years and even I was amused for a solid 30 seconds yesterday, but what possible reason is that for closing schools?

Update On Me

Remodeling is a pain in the ass, but i'm too cheap to pay somebody else so this is the result of converting our attached garage into a room for the kids. I laid some laminate flooring and put pine siding up on the walls after running electrical and insulation.

All of the work reminded me of how out of shape i am, so i started back up at the gym this week. like the room remodel, once the 'body remodel' is completed, maybe i'll post some pics.

no words can adequately express...

Police: 'One-Man Crime Spree' Arrested For 99th Time

story here

a brief summary of Cedric McCants' 'career':
99 arrests
78 convictions
15 jail sentences

i'll skip the puns on his name and just congratulate the man for a very impressive career.

Tourist pamphlet spoilt by nose picking girl

according to the Telegraph.co.uk news...

A council's attempt to promote a tourist attraction has been undermined by an unfortunate picture, say critics.
A leaflet extolling the elysian beauties of Thornham Walks - a 12-mile footpath network in Suffolk - has a picture of a young girl picking her nose.
Andrew Stringer, a Green councillor, says that "it does not represent our youth in the best light" and wants the "amateurish" pamphlet to be withdrawn.
A Mid Suffolk District Council spokesman admitted: "It's not the best photograph", but added: "They wanted a real picture, not a typical staged one.
"It's a real picture and shows children in their Easter outfits."

a kid picking her nose doesn't represent their youth in the best light, whereas, the paper-mache easter bunny hats are pretty normal.

Ry Cooder (by request)

Come Again?

In case you missed Mr. Bill's speech in response to a question about Hillary running negative campaign ads, here's a quick recap...

"Give me a break. This whole thing is the biggest fairy tale I've ever seen."
"What did you think about the Obama thing calling Hillary the senator from Punjab? Did you like that? Or what about the Obama handout that was covered up, the press never reported on, implying that I was a crook. Scouring me — scathing criticism over my financial reports. Ken Starr spent $70 million and indicted innocent people to find out that I wouldn't take a nickel to see the cow jump over the moon.

"So you can take a shot at Mark Penn if you want. It wasn't his best day. He was hurt. He felt badly we didn't do better in Iowa," said Clinton. "But the idea that one of these campaigns is positive and the other is negative when I know the reverse is true — and I have seen it and I have been blistered by it for months — is a little tough to take. Just because of the sanitizing coverage that's in the media doesn't mean the facts aren't out there."

I love politicians. "...the idea that one of these campaigns is positive and the other is negative when i know the reverse is true..." And the reverse would be ... that one is negative and the other is positive? Xrist that is profound! And that's what I love about politicians, the uncanny ability to say nothing and be passionate about it. It's going to be a long year listening to all of this drivel.

Is Britney Legally Batshit Bonkers?

Personally, having experienced a similar lapse in good judgment on occasion, I seriously doubt anything long term will come of this incident. Give it 72 hours and the world will continue as if this little hiccup never happened at all.

However, there are some pseudo-sympathizers quite caught up in the drama and want to blame this tragedy on her parents suggesting that Ms Spears should have been court-ordered to a psychological evaluation far prior to this episode. For those of you in this category, I would like to point out the follow from the:

California Mental Health Law

particularly
Chapter 2: Involuntary Treatment
and
Article 2. Court-Ordered Evaluation for Mentally Disordered
which states...
5200. Any person alleged, as a result of mental disorder, to be a danger to others, or to himself, or to be gravely disabled, may be given an evaluation of his condition under a superior court order pursuant to this article. The provisions of this article shall be carried out with the utmost consideration for the privacy and dignity of the person for whom a court-ordered evaluation is requested.

5201. Any individual may apply to the person or agency designated by the county for a petition alleging that there is in the county a person who is, as a result of mental disorder a danger to others, or to himself, or is gravely disabled, and requesting that an evaluation of the person's condition be made.

that 'Any individual' part means 'Any individual' can request an evaluation for somebody. That means you or I have just as much authority as her parents, especially since Britney is not just our cute little mouseketeer anymore, but a legal adult.
Or course, the reason more people don't do this is because of section 5203 which states...

5203. Any individual who seeks a petition for court-ordered evaluation knowing that the person for whom the petition is sought is not, as a result of mental disorder, a danger to himself, or to others, or gravely disabled is guilty of a misdemeanor, and may be held liable in civil damages by the person against whom the petition was sought.

That means you damn sure better be quite certain she is certifiable before seeking such an injunction. Since a large pct of celebrities live in their own created reality, i suspect it would be very difficult to prove that Ms. Spears is or was that many degrees off-kilter to warrant such a drastic scenario.

If you believe she was, then you should have reported her.